the unexpected

You need to learn to expect the unexpected, because if you don't then things can throw you off balance.
Case and point, I live in Dagenham, I know, pity me, but I also spend time in Barking because that's where my St John division is. Now twice in this area I have been asked if I have drugs, once whilst waiting for my division to open. I can't explain it, maybe it's my hair. Then there's south of the river. I was in Millwall last night and as I was walking from the station (Surrey Quays) to the ground, I got stopped by a local. Now I say this without intending prejudice, but I thought, because of my backpack, that I was going to be asked if I had drugs on me. So imagine my surprise when I was in fact asked how to volunteer with St John.
Hence, expect the unexpected.

an interesting week

It's been one of those weeks for me. Something new, something out of the ordinary and a bit of work too, albeit paperwork.
Starting with Tuesday doing some audit work for the ambulance service, and apart from the odd gripe from the crews about hand gels breaking and not always having everything they should have or would like to have, but for the most part the ambulances are safe, around Camden at least. Oh, and I learnt one of the great mysteries of the ambulance service; why paramedics call signs end with H.

Wednesday was interesting at Millwall too, the only patient we saw on our station was a young woman with some of the most confusing symptoms that I and quite a few other people there had ever seen. Even now I'm not quite sure what to make of it, hopefully I will find out more when I return to the den on Tuesday.

Thursday I got my results, and while they may not be earth shattering I did at least pass.

I can't wait for next week, with at least four duties it will be a fun week.

keeping things clean

No I don't mean dusting or hoovering, at least, not for tomorrow. You see, I get to spend the afternoon looking in the back of ambulances in London, making sure they are clean and safe so that if you ever happen to be unfortunate enough to have to take a trip in one you wont come out of it with more issues than you had when you went in it.
It does however mean I have to do some traveling, but its by train and it won't be in rush hour, so I should get a seat, with any luck.
Now I would tell you more, but I don't actually know what I can and can't say with regards to tomorrow, hence the vagueness of this post, hopefully I will have more to report tomorrow though.

silence

I hate it, silence. I find it awkward, uninteresting. It's safe to say I could never live in silence. It's why I talk so much, and annoy friends as a result, and for that I'm sorry. But either we talk or I end up listening to music, or singing in my head. Even when I'm going to sleep I need some sort of noise, from the street, or the low buzz of a fan, or music playing from my iPod dock.
I don't do well when I'm on my own, I need music playing, or the telly on. If not I'm liable to talk to the cat, dog, or myself (I'm not sure which one of those is worse, any suggestions?).
But it is a fine line, a sudden noise is likely to send me flailing for a phone, or radio or some other noise-making device in the room until the noise stops. Or it doesn't and I wake up properly to find the cause and attempt to shut it up, which isn't always possible, then I just end up grumpy.
I suppose you could say I am a tough one to figure out, or as I tend to put it: not even I know what goes on in my mind half the time.
Oh, and on a little side note I'm considering starting my own media company to bring together my various bits and pieces that I do. How does 'there be monsters here media ©' sound?
Either way I'm laying claim to it now.
Til next time, see you later

gurrila journalism

The events as they stand from yesterday night and today. Romford was attacked, I have been told the main trouble centered around the station. However Debenhams was attacked and a shop called Bank next to JD sports was also attacked. Today the police have advised all shops to close by 4, and that has happened. At the Liberty shopping center all the bins have been removed and locked away.
Shops have also been boarding up their windows.
Barking and Ilford have been told to shut up shop at 3, and Heathway half 3.
Many shops have closed, and there are many police on the streets, as well as many groups of people.
I also have reports that at least two premises in Barking have been attacked.
It would appear that North East London, from Ilford to Romford will be a no go area tonight if the police are right.
Follow me on twitter @ http://twitter.com/tbuzer for the latest news and updates

a series of extrodinary events

Firstly, I am now back on twitter, http://twitter.com/tbuzer so follow me if you like
Secondly, with regards to the London riots, I have been hearing rumors about various places being smashed up, one of those places I shall go to investigate tommorow, to see if it's true.
Thirdly I urge all my readers to stay safe and not get involved in any way, these truley are dangerous times we live in.
Finally, on twitter if you do post about the riots, please use the hashtag #stoptheriots
Thankyou

the social side of life

I've come to realise something. As technology has grown, we have all grown further apart. We have things like e-mail, texts and so called social networks like facebook. I say so called because how is something like facebook social, really? You can't go to the movies on facebook, you can't go out for a meal with friends, you can't even go out for a drink. Instead you add 'friends', half of whom you have never met before, and you poke people, and like the most stupid of pages, an example of which I would give you, if I could find any on my homepage.
Facebook isn't social, it's asocial, yeah you keep in contact, but at what cost? I know there are positives too, but for me the negatives far outweigh them.
For example, in the 80's, all my dad's friends knew where he lived, and I would be willing to bet he knew where they all lived.
I on the other hand, know where roughly 8 or so of my friends live. That number will probably be lower for my friends that know where I live. How can that be an improvement on the past?
I think things need to change, and I'm going to start where else, but on facebook?

fear

Now I'm Pagan, more specifically, Wiccan; well I say now, in reality I have been learning and following the craft and the traditions for about 5 years now. In that time I've noticed a great many things. One of them is ignorance, a lot of people, on seeing a pentagram (five pointed star) say one of two things. The first is devil worshiper, personally I blame Hollywood for that one. If you did any reading you would come to realise that for many in the craft there is no acknowledgment of any form of devil, beast or other ever-present malevolent being. Rather, evil is seen in the actions of man, just look at current affairs, Syria, Lybia and the whole Arab uprising could be seen to be caused by evil actions of men. The other thing I hear repeatedly is 'I didn't know you were Jewish'. That just annoys me because I am just a little bit pedantic, a Star of David has six points and cannot be drawn in one single movement, a pentagram on the other hand has five points, and can be drawn in one single movement, it's simple maths and simple shapes for crying out loud. Like my name, Tomas Buzer, the number of people who pronounce it (and this is vaguely phonetically spelled) Toemass Buzzer is incredible. One, the h in Thomas is silent, so it doesn't bloody matter if it is there in the spelling or not, it has no bearing on the pronunciation of the word. Secondly, my last name has only one z in it, so stop saying it buzzer, thats just bad English right there, which does piss me off, because I am pedantic, but also because I am a writer and i consider a comprehension of the English language a basic skill. But anyway, thats enough ranting for one post, I haven't even got onto the point why I am writing this blog.
My point is that even after 5 years, I still have a little voice in the back of my head telling me not to openly wear a pentagram, not because I may offend someone, not because I may scare someone, but because I'm afraid of being discriminated against because of my faith. I'm afraid because even though I belong to an established religion, one following traditions that predate almost anything else out there, people don't see it as such.
Yes we live in a tolerant society, but exactly how tolerant? From past experience it seems that many preconceived notions about Paganism in general come from depictions in media, usually unfaithful depictions based on preconceived notions from yesteryear. All this negative press has fed into our collective schemas (psychological term) to the point where a pentagram is almost always considered evil, even from first glance. True, shows such as charmed may be the crest of a building wave that could reverse this trend, but even then, it isn't really a true depiction. If you say magick to someone, they're more likely to think pulling a rabbit out of a hat, or Harry Potter, rather than the redirection of energy towards a physical goal. But this is all off topic, again. (Note to self, must stop going off topic).
The point is, I still have that fear, that voice forever and continually screaming noooooooooooooo at me. And I want to know if anyone else has that fear, that voice, even the same thoughts as me; well maybe not the same, but similar.
And I would like to close with a thought, next year the census results for the UK come out, my hope is that with any luck, Paganism as a whole will have reached the threshold to be fully recognized, so that these fears I have can be calmed, and that voice can finally be given a rest.